


Baby Daddy

by mourningjoules



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Game, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-22
Updated: 2018-07-22
Packaged: 2019-06-14 16:09:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,073
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15392469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mourningjoules/pseuds/mourningjoules
Summary: Dave is a young single parent working his ass off to support Lil Cal and John is a PhD student living down the hall. Courtship ensues. But can John break into Dave’s heart, or is it already occupied by a 5 year old blonde?





	Baby Daddy

Your name is Dave Strider and you are exhausted. 

Why your sister had to fly in at five in the morning, you don’t know, something about her not wanting to be “touched by the sunlight” or some bullshit. You shake your head, dismissing your totally legit theory that your sister is a vampire and turn your attention to Lil Cal, sitting atop your shoulders. She’s patiently waiting the arrival of your sister, holding a handmade sign covered in big, sparkly, purple letters reading Auntie Rose. You smirk, Rose hates the name and that makes you love it more. She’s gonna hate it. 

While you are distracted by your own thoughts, it’s five in the morning why am I here why am I here why am I here, Lil Cal finally notices Rose from the group of arriving passengers. She screams “AUNTIE ROSE” at the top of her lungs and demands to be put down. You lower her to the ground grimacing, immediately rubbing your back to work out the strain. Man she has gotten heavy. 

By the time you make it back to your apartment the sun is rising, much to your distaste. You fumble with your keys as Lil Cal talks your sister’s ear off, telling her about every little thing that pops into her six year old brain. 

“For Halloween I think I want to be a princess but I also want to be an astronaut but I think I also want to be a zombie soccer player and Auntie Rose what do you think I should be? What are you going to be? I think maybe you should go as a Queen! And Dave can go as a King! And I can be a princess astronaut and--” 

The door opens. Finally. 

You carry in your sisters bags, apologize for the mess, and pass out on the couch. You hear Rose roll her eyes, yes you can hear it, and then she mutters something about “Yes Dave, I will put her to bed, I am here on vacation, but I much rather would spend my time being your personal nanny” before you fall asleep. 

The next morning, you don’t wake up until well into the afternoon. It was Saturday, what else would you be doing. You’re surprised to find the entire living room floor visible. You rub your eyes and pinch yourself in the forearm. Nope, not still dreaming. The toys and blankets that usually occupy 75% of the floor space have magically been moved somewhere else. You make a mental note to change your vampire theory to witch as you peel yourself off the couch.  
“Good morning brother,” Rose says, slightly annoyed you think. You’re not sure, your brain isn’t at its full capacity. Coffee will change that. 

“Dear sister!” you exclaim halfheartedly, rolling off the side of the couch, “how did you get in here? I thought vampires needed permission to enter before entering someone’s humble abode?” Rose is not amused, your vampire theory has been way overplayed, which is why you need to learn more about witch culture for your next round of sibling rivalry. 

“Oh brother, remember, you let me in last night right before you passed out, leaving me with childcare duties both last night and this morning. If you can’t afford a nanny, you certainly can’t afford my rates for child care.” 

“If you don’t want to participate in childcare duties I can charge you rent, but if you can’t afford to stay at a hotel you can’t-“ 

Your snarky retort is cut off by your precious bundle of torturous joy runs towards you, ready to be lifted up. “Dave!” she smiles as you pick her up, trying not to notice Rose snicker as you visibly grimace as you lift Cal up. She smiles, nuzzling her tiny head into your neck. Aw man my heart. A goofy smile adorns your face and even your sister smiles, pausing your sibling rivalry for now but mentally you count that last exchange as a win. 

“Yes princes?” 

“Will you braid my hair?” pleadingly she takes off her pointy Strider shades and starts the puppy-dog-eye routine. You can’t say no to her perfect golden eyes. 

Once lil Cal is situated with her pigtails, you fix her up lunch and plop her in front of the TV. You join Rose in the kitchen for a tea party – aka high class sibling bonding. 

“So dearest brother,” Rose starts out, sipping her “tea” which you know is just vodka in a teacup. “How is life?” 

“You ask that like you don’t already know everything about me Rose,” you say sipping your “tea” which is just apple juice, you don’t like to drink when Lil Cal is present. “I keep you updated on the big things don’t I? I mean this week I have parent teacher conferences which are always a good time. Concerned teachers that are old enough to be my parents giving me those judgmental stares probably thinking I’m irresponsible and not fit to be herding kids on my own but honestly I am good I –” 

“Dave you’re rambling.” 

“You’re the one asking these open ended questions, be more specific dear sister of mine or you are going to get word vomit worse than Lil Cal when she’s talking about the ranking order of Disney Princess movies. While I don’t agree with her on some of them, I think she has a point when she says Frozen is way too overrated and –”

“Dave.” She cuts you off, obviously annoyed. “If I wanted to talk about Disney Princess movies I would talk to Calliope over there as she has more in-depth perspectives on characters and overall is more pleasant to talk to.” 

You sigh, you know she wants to talk about the more serious aspects of life but you really don’t want to hear what she has to say about your parenting style, your way of life, messy apartment, etc. Rose can be somewhat judgmental sometimes. Despite your better judgment, you bravely you chug the rest of your apple juice and turn towards her. 

“Fine, well what do you want to talk about dearest Rosaline,” she rolls her eyes, obviously annoyed. 

“Dave, I know you think I have this secret agenda against you, but I am trying to be genuine here. I am concerned for you, you’re exhausted; you aren’t taking care of yourself. And frankly, I’m surprised you didn’t invite me over to help sooner.” She uncrosses her arms and her expression softens. “So let me ask again, how are you?” 

I really don’t want to talk about this. She probably senses your uneasiness about the subject but you know she won’t let this go. You take off her shades, an indicator that you are going to be completely vulnerable and serious about this matter and Rose scoots closer, idly scratching her hand against your back waiting for you to spill your soul. 

“I’m doing…okay,” you tentatively say. The last thing you need is for her to pull out pen and paper and start to psychoanalyze this conversation. 

“And what do you mean by ‘okay’,” So she doesn’t need a pen to analyze, damn. You sigh again and she wraps a comforting arm around your shoulder. “It’s okay Dave, just tell me what’s wrong.” 

“I mean, moneys tightish. We aren’t in a bad place but I’m doing everything I can to makes sure she has everything she needs. And then school, man her teachers are not subtle with their judgmental comments and looks they give me. I mean, I know I’m only 23 but they don’t have the right. I mean, I am doing amazingly parenting this shit and they don’t even recognize that. Despite all that, I think Cali is doing great but she started talking about boys and I’m not ready for those conversations, what do you think that even means when a six year old likes a boy like--,” and you rambled again. Shit. 

“Dave, all of that’s great. But what about you?” 

“What?” You’re confused. You just laid everything out in a feelings jam, which is honestly one of the hardest things for you to do and she is asking the same question again. “Did you not just listen to me drop the soon-to-be platinum record of my feelin –” she cuts you off again, man do you hate that. 

“All you are telling me is about Cal, and while your ‘word vomit’ as you so eloquently put it is more genuine than the last, all you are telling me is about is Cal and you don’t think that is slightly concerning?” she pulls away from your embrace, looking you dead on in the eyes. “You need to do stuff for you. How is Dave doing?” 

You furrow your brow, “That’s selfish?” you don’t sound as confident as you initially intended. “I mean, my goal in life now is to make sure that she’s happy. That’s my only priority.” 

Rose looks upset, “I know Dave, but, if you don’t take time to do stuff for yourself, you can end up depressed and slowly disintegrate and that will make everything harder. Taking care of Cali, going to work, everything will end up being exhausting and become increasingly difficult.” She takes another sip of her disguised martini, “Do you talk to anyone else besides me? Do you have friends?” 

Ouch that hurt. “Um….” But you don’t have a good answer. I mean, do Cali’s friends’ parents count as friends? They are more peers than anything. Coworkers? I mean, they ask me to come for drinks but I never go so does that at least count as an acquaintance? Oh Rose is snapping in my face. 

“Dave, hello?”  
“Yeah, yeah don’t get your panties in a twist okay Rose. I’m here, I’m present, I’m listening. Alive and in flesh, Dave Strider, the world’s most captive audience ready to listen to your sister bullshit about how I need to make friends like I am some socially ostracized third grader who’s mom has to intervene to make friends.” 

“Dave I know it’s not what you want to hear, but it’s the truth,” she reaches for her bag, pulling a neatly folded paper from its contents. “Here, I found this earlier while Cali and I were cleaning and I think you should go.” Her arm extends and you reach for the flyer, thinking it will be some support group for single parents or lonely adults. 

Instead the flyer reads 

5 YEAR HIGH SCHOOL REUINION – CLASS OF 2013 

Your poker face has betrayed you and disgust is clear on your face. Who has high school reunions only after 5 years? You just got out of the joint and you aren’t looking at going back anytime soon. You glance up at Rose, not even bothering to finish reading the flyer because you already decided you were not going to go. 

“Rose. No.” She shakes her head in disappointment, but honestly did she expect anything else? 

“Dave,” she sits back down next to you and a soft sigh escapes her lips. At least you know she is being genuine and not just trying to get you to go for shits and giggles. “I think this will be good for you, reconnecting with potential friends who might still be in the area. You need a bigger support system, I’m worried about you. I don’t want you to become depressed agai –” 

This time you cut her off. “Rose, I appreciate it but I’m fine. I’m healthy, I’m happy, I have Cal and that’s all I need right now.” You voice isn’t completely sure, its betraying you. Shoving your face into your hands you let out a groan of frustration. Who am I trying to convince here, me or Rose? 

“Just think about it okay?” She says, getting up to refill her tea cup. You glance over at Cal, still amazed by the wonderful world of My Little Pony, and then back towards your sister. “If anything,” she adds, a knowing smirk on her face, “you could go just for the free booze. I will provide the child care at a reduced rate.” 

You roll your eyes, “Fine, I will think about it.” But you know despite whatever conclusion you would come to regarding this matter, Rose will make you go. Might as well go willingly. 

Your name is Dave Strider and you are not looking forward to this.

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written fanfics in forever so I am sorry


End file.
